Don't Cost a Thing

Continuing on with the theme of change, I want to use this rare moment of vulnerability to speak out about this difficult yet wonderful time in my life.

As I stated in my previous post, I turned 25 not too long ago. I know some people will think "big deal", but in all actuality it is a big deal. The world we live in is ridiculous and I honestly feel like one of those days its going to implode, so any additional years of life on this Earth I am thankful for. Most of the changes I am experiencing are of the emotional variety. I feel myself maturing and not seeing things through such a narrow lens. I am embracing my sexuality more and more, and feeling confident in my orientation. There are things that I NEED for my life that I am now able to demand because of how hard I have worked to get here.

With that being said, the theme for this post is "Knowing your Worth". In my younger years I had a huge problem with self-esteem. I felt that I was never good enough, smart enough, good looking enough, talented enough, and more importantly I never thought I was worth a damn penny. I struggled through high school with personal identity, and even with all the academic achievements that I accomplished I still felt that I had nothing to offer this world. As I got older, and I started making an identity for myself, I got a chance somewhere down the line to assess my life. With that assessment I realized that I have to stop comparing my life to worldly standards, and when I stopped assessing my life through that scope I realized that I have done ALOT. With me doing ALOT I had to also realize that there are things in this life that I need in order to "reach the pinnacles I plan to reach".

Self-Worth. What helped me find mine was through self-evaluation. As human beings we tend to get so caught up and the things we see, and what everyone else is doing that we rarely get an opportunity to acknowledge and commend ourselves. I had to learn to become my own cheerleader, because in the grand scheme of things we have no guarantees that other people are going to give us what we need. We have to be our own support system. Friends, family, and significant others can only extend themselves but so much without neglecting themselves, and at the end of the day those people should be secondary supports. We need to be firm within ourselves and AFFIRM that we are good enough. I know this is a difficult task, but it can start out with something as simple as making a list of our accomplishments whether big or small. Once you've written those accomplishments out, do something to celebrate them. Make this an ongoing trend of success followed by celebration, and you will find in a short time that your esteem will be that much higher. Other people will begin to notice it to. Try it and see what happens.

~Stanz A. Lone